I like big cars, big boats, big motorcycles, big houses and big campfires. I
believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some governmental
stooge with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts for
squirting out babies.


Guns do not make you a killer.* I think killing makes you a killer.* You can
kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you
from driving to the ball game.


I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are
no girls allowed.* Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA
BURKE?


I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an
opinion.


I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.
The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like
the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television,
and Miss Black America.* Try to have things like the United Caucasian College
Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America;
and see what happens.* Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.


I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different,
weird, or tick me off.


When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the
population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law of
Probability.


I know what sex is, and there are not varying degrees of it.* If I received
sex from one of my subordinates in my office, it wouldn't be a private matter
or my personal business.* I would be "FIRED" immediately!


I believe that if you are selling me a milk shake, a pack of cigarettes, a
newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English!* As a matter of fact,
if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!


My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries
you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.* I think the police should
have every right to shoot your sorry self if you threaten them after they
tell you to stop.* If you can't understand the word "freeze" or "stop" in
English, see the above lines.


I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation recount
votes when needed. I know what the definition of lying is.


I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are
qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or
tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any
other business.


We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in
wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over
here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their
interpretations.


I don't hate the rich.* I don't pity the poor.* I know pro wrestling is fake,
but so are movies and television.* That doesn't stop you from watching them.


I believe a self-righteous liberal or conservative with a cause is more
dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.


I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue
to make more.* If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system
that's better, and put your name on the building.* Ask your buddy that
invented the Internet to help you.


It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a
parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary,
and say "NO!"


"I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't
pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new
lip ring heals.* I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you
serve me french fries!


I am sick of "Political Correctness."* I know a lot of black people, and not
a single one of them was born in Africa; so how can they be "African
Americans"?* Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a
European American because my great, great, great, great, great, great
grandfather was from Europe.* I am proud to be from America and nowhere else.


And if you don't like my point of view, tough.*

~~Andy Rooney on 60Minutes

http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/bl-andyrooney.htm

I expected better from you Chister.

Andy Rooney happens to be pretty much exactly opposite of all that.

He is the epitome of the liberal elite media in America.

George Carlin is my Hero Too!!!

Subject: Bad American by George Carlin

Well....make your own judgment!

I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American.

I am George Carlin.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some midlevel governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies.

I'm not in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!

I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang.

I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer.

I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.

I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you'd better do it in English.

I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions.

I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4-7 years of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God or gods, just leave the rest of us out of it. This also applies to sexuality.

My heroes are John Wayne, the Simpsons, and whoever canceled Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.

I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.

I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I am freezing my ass through a long winter?

I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt, I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut-the-#$%!-up already.

I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money. And why is he always part of the problem and not the solution.

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them. I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you are breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.

I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.

I hate those bastards standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making 'donations' to their cause. These people should be targets.

I think if you are in the passing lane, and not passing, your license should be revoked, and you should be forced to ride the bus until you promise to never delay the rest of us again.

I think beef jerky could quite possibly be the perfect food.

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement.

I think Dr. Seuss was a genius.

I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.

I believe if she has her lips on your willie, it is sex, and it is sex for both of you. This even applies when you are President of the United States.

If that makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.

If you too are a BAD American please forward this to everyone you know. We need our country back!

I think someone needs to change his name to ReChister....not cause he's retardeded either ;)....


:usa:

come to think of it...isn't there some kind of award we can Give Chister for 2 different reposts in the same thread :confused:


:usa:

Originally posted by YellowSub1962
come to think of it...isn't there some kind of award we can Give Chister for 2 different reposts in the same thread :confused:


:usa:

Am I allowed to give him my Asshat Award? :flipoff2:

Originally posted by f0cker


Am I allowed to give him my Asshat Award? :flipoff2:

The rule is that you can only pass your asshat award on to another if that person's user # is at least double what yours is.