TEX
06-23-2003, 07:16 AM
Probably a repost, but first time I've seen it :D
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when
suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud
towards him. The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the
window and asks the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how
many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"
The shepherd looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then
looks at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answers,
"Sure. Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the
internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to
get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another
NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution
photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop
and exports it to an image processing facility y in Hamburg,
Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot
that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then
accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected
Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas.
He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and,
after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a
full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet
printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly
1586 sheep."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep." says the
shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals
and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of
his car.
Then the shepherd says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you
exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay,
why not?"
"You're a consultant." says the shepherd.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the shepherd. "You showed
up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for
an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you
don't know crap about my business ... "
" ... now give me back my dog." :D
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when
suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud
towards him. The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the
window and asks the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how
many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"
The shepherd looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then
looks at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answers,
"Sure. Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the
internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to
get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another
NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution
photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop
and exports it to an image processing facility y in Hamburg,
Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot
that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then
accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected
Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas.
He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and,
after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a
full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet
printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly
1586 sheep."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep." says the
shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals
and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of
his car.
Then the shepherd says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you
exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay,
why not?"
"You're a consultant." says the shepherd.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the shepherd. "You showed
up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for
an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you
don't know crap about my business ... "
" ... now give me back my dog." :D