well i got the results from the paterity testing and 93.89% says that i created it.
now i have to figure out what the fawk is going to happen.
I have to wait till she tells me what she wants, because i know what i want. i just have to make sure they match.
In my present life status i cannot raise a child alone, and nor could i stand the mother without strangleing her. This could change at any time, but right here/now it is not going to happen.
I will not seperate a child from his mother unless i had a very fawking good reason. My own desires are NOT a good reason.


child support will have to be figured so here is a question for the office chair lawyers.
What is an acceptable ammount of child support? is it deturmined by amount erned? state lived in ? (she is military in Germany, home of record is CA) is this a variable amount or is it a constant? what other factors contribute to it?

i want to figure this all out so we can work an agreement when that time comes (soon)

oh man. and you were soooo sure it wasnt. I have nothing to add other than good luck.

Originally posted by sceep
oh man. and you were soooo sure it wasnt. I have nothing to add other than good luck.

dude i am used to this kind of luck:rolleyes: i actualy find it amusing at times.

Call your legal and ask, but they will probably tell you something along the lines that it depends on where the mother files to get child support from, the judges mood, and your income.

The wife's ex is required to pay,.......get this,.....hold your breath,........a whooping $60 a month,......and he doesn't even pay that.

In cali, one of the biggest determining values is time spent with child. IE, a father that cares for the child %50 of the time will pay far less and in some cases nothing. Where as, if you plan on just mailing a check in, be prepared to mail in a big check.


d

Confuscious say:

Man who too fond of creampie gets his just desserts.





:flipoff2: :flipoff2: :flipoff2: good luck.

Originally posted by usmcdoc14
My own desires are NOT a good reason.


child support will have to be figured so here is a question for the office chair lawyers.
What is an acceptable ammount of child support? is it deturmined by amount erned? state lived in ? (she is military in Germany, home of record is CA) is this a variable amount or is it a constant? what other factors contribute to it?

i want to figure this all out so we can work an agreement when that time comes (soon)

Glad you have that in mind, because that's how the law works. Even loooooong after you determine the time has come, the law will say otherwise. So get ready for a bile ride, and keep swallowing your natural instincts.

In the states I've lived in, there is no 'acceptable' child support amount. It's based on your gross income, her gross income, and crossed on a constant. At your income level, it's going to come out to around 22% of your pre-tax income. Try to get the court to allow you to swap tax deductions, because federal law says only the custodial parent gets it, and the Navy is very dilligent about following those rules. As long as she doesn't claim on the year you do, the IRS will allow it. If you both claim, you're guilty of income-tax evasion, not her, no matter what the court says. :)

Originally posted by JeepRecoveryTeam
In cali, one of the biggest determining values is time spent with child. IE, a father that cares for the child %50 of the time will pay far less and in some cases nothing. Where as, if you plan on just mailing a check in, be prepared to mail in a big check.


d

child is in Germany, i am here. that would be some amusing government flight working or a very pricy "dad is going to take you for the week"

Originally posted by rusted


At your income level, it's going to come out to around 22% of your pre-tax income. :)

$1749.30 a month is my current pay before taxes, so around $450 (? i dont have a calculator so i am guessing) I would rather work this with her outside any leagal hearings and shat. have us both draw up an agree ment and sign it. i have an Appt. with legal just to find out what can and cannot be held legal in wrighting.

Originally posted by InfantryYJ


The wife's ex is required to pay,.......get this,.....hold your breath,........a whooping $60 a month,......and he doesn't even pay that.


thank you for making me sick :flipoff2:

I think I'm in shock for you. Good luck Gil :roxy:

Damn, hope it works out for the best for you and the child.

Originally posted by usmcdoc14


$1749.30 a month is my current pay before taxes, so around $450 (? i dont have a calculator so i am guessing) I would rather work this with her outside any leagal hearings and shat. have us both draw up an agree ment and sign it. i have an Appt. with legal just to find out what can and cannot be held legal in wrighting.

I'm jsut shooting from the hip here, but that sounds exactly right to me. $450 that is.

It depends on her income. Unless she is making a LOT of money, that figure isn't going to change much. They want about 1/4 of your income unless you're absolutely rich. It's dropped a little because you're poorly paid. So, ~22%.
Michigan's child support formula might as well be a recipe for making C4, but it's comprehensbile and pretty standard. Check out the state you're trying to file an agreement in, but first check and see if that's even possible. The court may take one look at your agreement, file it in the round file and set it's own amount.

Originally posted by JeepRecoveryTeam
In cali, one of the biggest determining values is time spent with child. IE, a father that cares for the child %50 of the time will pay far less and in some cases nothing. Where as, if you plan on just mailing a check in, be prepared to mail in a big check.


d


True dat. I know a couple of divorced guys and that's how it
worked for them. IIRC in Kali there's a formula that the court
just plugs the numbers in and that's what your child support
payment is. Numbers include her income, your income, and what
percentage of custody you have.

Also, it should be for you squids too, you may be able to receive the "with dependents" pay, if so, bank on that being gone to the child.

Guess a congratulations is in order....though I'm not sure. ;)

Originally posted by Joe_W



thank you for making me sick :flipoff2:

Doesn't it though,........it's funny how he can not pay for his own kid, but the last time I saw him, he was wearing "name brand" clothes from head to toe:rolleyes:

Originally posted by InfantryYJ
Also, it should be for you squids too, you may be able to receive the "with dependents" pay, if so, bank on that being gone to the child.

i cant. unless i have aprtial custody of the child then i can not claim it as a dependant for pay amount nor for taxes.

btw for amusement sake i was using the online calculator and it required her to make 8 TIMES as much as me for my amount to pay her dropped.

Originally posted by usmcdoc14


i cant. unless i have aprtial custody of the child then i can not claim it as a dependant for pay amount nor for taxes.



Get the legal beagles to draw up the paperwork for you to have joint custody, mother has guardianship of the child, that should work for pay purposes.

Originally posted by usmcdoc14


dude i am used to this kind of luck:rolleyes: i actualy find it amusing at times.


With all due respect - "luck" has nothing to do with this situation.

Originally posted by DRM



With all due respect - "luck" has nothing to do with this situation.

:laughing:

Originally posted by DRM



With all due respect - "luck" has nothing to do with this situation.


damn... someone beat me to it.
Doc, sorry to hear about your plight, and considering your pay I believe (hope for you) maybe they will drop it some.
Good luck

Originally posted by DRM



With all due respect - "luck" has nothing to do with this situation.

realy i would say it does, she was on birth control (suposidly) for the last 6 years. unless i have some mutant sperm something went wrong.

bad luck
shit luck
dumb luck

no matter how you cut it life finds me fun to play with, this is nothing man ,let me tell you exactly how interesting life can get :flipoff2:

Originally posted by usmcdoc14
i have some mutant sperm



Can we make it a poll - cause this is my vote :p ;)

Originally posted by usmcdoc14


she was on birth control (suposidly) for the last 6 years.
:
She must be on the wrong kind then.
What will I do today, hhhmmm get knocked up and fawk up 3 peoples lives:rolleyes:
Kind of wonder if it was really an "Accident"













Sorry I have no respect for the girl because of her actions.
And Gil it is nowhere close to being over.

Well I feel for ya!

I am still glad I have my little one. He is a charmer. I love him with all my heart.

Now his Mother on the other hand, well I won't go there!

My child support is $509.09 I also have to p[ay half of his medical expenses.

I love my son so much I would pay twice that if that is what the courts asked, and if I knew it was all going to my son and not her to go eat out and buy clothes with.

Never get involved with Redheads! Ever!
:eek:

Originally posted by APRILRAZZ

She must be on the wrong kind then.
What will I do today, hhhmmm get knocked up and fawk up 3 peoples lives:rolleyes:
Kind of wonder if it was really an "Accident"













Sorry I have no respect for the girl because of her actions.
And Gil it is nowhere close to being over.

Look up the stats on the pill...it is NOT 100% effective, nor are any other methods. I personally know 2 women on Depo Provera who have gotten pregnant.

Yes the chic may be a whack job and lied about being on pill but no one but her knows

Originally posted by Joe_W


Look up the stats on the pill...it is NOT 100% effective, nor are any other methods. I personally know 2 women on Depo Provera who have gotten pregnant.

Yes the chic may be a whack job and lied about being on pill but no one but her knows
I realize things happen. I have my son due to failed BC. But the whole situation stinks to high heaven. Too many unanswered questions. Big thing Why did she wait 7 months to say anything to him.
Sorry, I have seen more than my fair share of people getting suckered in this way and I hate to see it happen to someone like him. It never turns out right and at some point gets ugly.

Originally posted by APRILRAZZ

I realize things happen. I have my son due to failed BC. ....



What does British Columbia have to do with you getting knocked up?



:flipoff2:

Originally posted by APRILRAZZ

I realize things happen. I have my son due to failed BC. But the whole situation stinks to high heaven. Too many unanswered questions. Big thing Why did she wait 7 months to say anything to him.
Sorry, I have seen more than my fair share of people getting suckered in this way and I hate to see it happen to someone like him. It never turns out right and at some point gets ugly.

True..at the same time if I remember correctly he dipped the pen in the inkwell more than once, even after the primary drama :D

I do agree it never turns out well and the person I feel most sorry for is the kid

Gil, in Oregon the support goes off of both of your combined income...

say, you make $6 per year (60%), and she makes $4 per year(40%), then there is a chart that they have, they look up your combined income of $10 (100% ... are yall with me here?). then there is a set ammount that the state figures should be used to raise a child from your combined income, say for your total of $10, they think that $2.50 should take care of the kid. so you pay her 60% of $2.50. so supposedly, it's "fair". anyway that's where the numbers come from.

there are other things that can knock it up or down, health insurance, time spent w/ kid, etc.

BTW... way to be responsible and deal with your actions. not a lot of people would step up to the plate.

Originally posted by CruiserKitten
BTW... way to be responsible and deal with your actions. not a lot of people would step up to the plate.

No, a 'lot' of people DO step up to the plate, as in most. Perhaps not in your social circle though, I don't know.

I'd agree with Aprilrazz though. Gil being in the military, it's gauranteed support from you while you're in. No working under the table. Anyone in the service has seen it more than once.

The Navy will NOT give you BAQ, depedent care or anything without less than 51% physical custody. Shared legal custody is meaningless, in more ways than one.

Originally posted by Joe_W


True..at the same time if I remember correctly he dipped the pen in the inkwell more than once, even after the primary drama :D

I do agree it never turns out well and the person I feel most sorry for is the kid
True and unfourtunatly only hindsight is 20/20 but....there are alot of things that would make me question her motives. Like was part of her deciding to keep the kid because she wants to avoid a pending deployment?(happens alot more than people think) attempting to trap a husband, wants attention that he was no longer giving her? Who knows. Normally in the past I would side with the girl but past experiences with other friends opened my eyes a long time ago.

Originally posted by rusted

Shared legal custody is meaningless, in more ways than one.

this i agree more than you could ever imagine.
no matter how this may sound i dont give a fawk: I feel i want everything or nothing,if that makes sence. I dont want my self or my image or me or the idea of me to be used against this child in any way .and if in order to protect the child from having to deal with the shit i did growing up i would rather be a fucking check in the mail.
i dont want "part " of a child, and i dont want to be "part" of a childs life.
i fucked up and i will pay for my actions, more than just with my wallet as that is the easy part.

if she can give the child a better life than i can then so be it, and in my eyes right now she could. and as long as i am in the child get full medical. (btw she is active duty for those that didnt know)

I really feel for you........Sex is great till something like this happens and slapps your butt deep into reality. I have learned that you should never, never, never stick your dick into any woman that you don't think would not make a good mother for a child of yours. One of my biggest regets is that I chose my son a true low life for a mother......by mistake..... She didn't start off that way.....but that's where she ended up. The courts don't really want to hear anything from the father....and reward the mother being a drunken slut by charging the father unreasonable child support that supports the mothers addictions. The state of VIRGINIA feels it's better for my son to be raised by a drunken mother who's now living with a married man than for him to be raised in Mississippi by his father..............whoah......I got carried away there.....I pay $605.00 a month for child support so my sons mother and her live-in married boy-friend have a continuous
supply of GOLDSCHLAGGER. But I'm not bitter about it.

Originally posted by rusted

It depends on her income. Unless she is making a LOT of money, that figure isn't going to change much. They want about 1/4 of your income unless you're absolutely rich. It's dropped a little because you're poorly paid. So, ~22%.
Michigan's child support formula might as well be a recipe for making C4, but it's comprehensbile and pretty standard. Check out the state you're trying to file an agreement in, but first check and see if that's even possible. The court may take one look at your agreement, file it in the round file and set it's own amount.

I worked with a divorced guy years ago who made minimum wage, wife worked for the USPS and made a pretty good living and she even TOLD the judge that she made more then enough to support her and their daughter and that her ex needed his paycheck more then they did but the judge said it didn't matter and ordered him to pay $100 a month (back when minimum wage was three something an hour).
So he gave the Friend of the Court a check for $100 every month, Freind of the Court gave his ex a check for $100 every month and his ex gave him back the $100 every month. When he told me this the same $100 had been going back and fourth for 6 years!:laughing:

Originally posted by usmcdoc14


this i agree more than you could ever imagine.
no matter how this may sound i dont give a fawk: I feel i want everything or nothing,if that makes sence. I dont want my self or my image or me or the idea of me to be used against this child in any way .and if in order to protect the child from having to deal with the shit i did growing up i would rather be a fucking check in the mail.
i dont want "part " of a child, and i dont want to be "part" of a childs life.
i fucked up and i will pay for my actions, more than just with my wallet as that is the easy part.

if she can give the child a better life than i can then so be it, and in my eyes right now she could. and as long as i am in the child get full medical. (btw she is active duty for those that didnt know)

One good thing is, half-legal custody DOES count as a safety net. If you try and maintain a good visitation presence in the child's life, you have that much better chance of helpign the child if the female goes haywire. THAT'S a responsibility too.

One thing to remember: You are not alone, and you are not the only honorable person paying child support. They may treat you like a deadbeat, but remember you aren't one.

[/mushypeptalk]

Good luck man.

Don't be a check in the mail Dad. I know it seems as if your life just hit a brick wall, but it will work out. Kids need Dad's more than anything.

Without knowing any of the details, my military experience says she likely wanted to get prego! I doubt it was an accident on her part, too bad for you. Definately seek a lawyer and get things figured out. IT MUST BE all done through the courts for your protection. I suggest you seek a civilian lawyer.

However, I think Congrats are in order........... DAD! Everything is going to be fine.

PS..... don't get back with mom.

Originally posted by rusted


The Navy will NOT give you BAQ, depedent care or anything without less than 51% physical custody. Shared legal custody is meaningless, in more ways than one.

You squids must do things differently then,.....I know several Marines that have fathered children out of wed-lock and they receive at least partial-BAH. These Marines rarely see their kids, and some don't care to see them at all, but they've got allotments set up so they don't have to worry about a mother calling the command saying that a child support check didn't make it.

Look into diff money. She still gets what is due her and you get a little more $ in your paycheck. Also do not let her give the child your last name. It will be easier for her to get bennies outside the Army if their names mach.

I pay CS in the great state of Kalifornia. Like said in previous posts the more you see your child the "less" you will pay, because you will be directly paying for the childs upkeep on those days. 24% of gross with 7 days a month of visitation + $300 for childcare is what i pay for a 7 year old.

You are also responsible for half of all child care/med which has added an additional $300 onto my CS payment. Childcare is taken out after the CS and dosent rely on your income. So you could easily after taxes only bring home 25% of your pay.

PM me and i can give you a lot more info concerning Kali CS.

Moral of the story.

Should have put it in her butt... :flipoff2:

Good luck and seriously try and be part of that childs life, it truely is key to everything.

Originally posted by usmcdoc14
.........I would rather work this with her outside any leagal hearings and shat. have us both draw up an agree ment and sign it. i have an Appt. with legal just to find out what can and cannot be held legal in wrighting.

Unfortunately, you probably have no say in the agreement- no matter what you and the mother sign. If she is also in the military, the state she claims as her legal residence has precidence, and in most cases, the money is payroll deducted and sent to a freakin' state agency that oversees the distribution of funds.

yes for as long as your child lives in Kali your wages will be garnished. there is no way out of it. I payed my CS for a year with no late payments, but when the new laws went in to effect the state automatically contacted my employers and began to garnish my wages. It does suck to explain to your manager why your wages are garnished.

and they will charge you a service fee for having your wages garnished. it is a fawked system.

YOu will also have to contact the CS division that will be handling your case within 10 days of moving, phone # change, or employer change or they will try to fawk you.

Hey Gil, have you seen the baby yet? I don't think I could carry on without seeing my girls on a regular basis. Any pics?

Good luck, just signed my divorce yesterday. I get to pay a whoping $1100 per month for two children. We have joint custody, but she is the primary caregiver. Do not give up your rights on how the child is to be raised and cared for. Be a real dad. I unfortunately will have to be movig from the state where my children are at, but my company will fly me back every other weekend to see them, like most visitation agreements.

As far as child support goes, from what I understand it is basically the same thoughout the US. The combined income is multiplied by the percentage of each person portion of the total.(like aprilrazz said) then there are modifiers for time spent and caregiven to the children to increase or decrease the amount.

The amount will change as the years go by and income increases and decreases. I think most states allow for modification once a year. You should be entitled to tax deductions either by the percentage of income or agreed upon by the two parties.(ie: income is 66/34 with husband being 66%, wife gets deductions 2 out of 3 years) I was lucky. We agreed to slipt the kids for deductions ( I claim one and she claims one every year)

Good luck. Kids are awsome and enlightening. Be the dad you shold be as muh as possible.

Darius