billj
06-21-2002, 08:55 AM
Before anyone screams "Take it to Chit-Chat", it´s fawkin´ Zuk related!!!
Just something I wrote up and adapted around 04 years ago at an inspired moment. It might lighten your Friday.........
========================
Our hero was happily driving along a western desert highway in his lifted
and
locked Samurai when, all of a sudden, the beastly little 4x4 just died.
Perplexed, he pulled off to the shoulder, got out and lifted the hood. Now,
being a suspension wizard, but knowing nothing about motors, he just
shrugged
his shoulders and resolved to try to flag someone down.
After a short time, a dust cloud appeared on the horizon, immediately
preceded by a bullet travelling at an extremely high rate of speed. A
Porsche 911 turbo was upon him in no time. He frantically waved his arms,
but the bullet just screamed past. Disappointed, thinking that the driver
had not seen him, he turned to slowly walk back to his ailing Samurai.
Arriving at the side of his Suzuki, he heard the squeal of tires and looked
back to see the Porsche returning in reverse. Out from the car climbed a
long, lean individual, kind of a young Clint Eastwood of the spaghetti
western days.
The owner of the Porsche offered to help the Samurai guy out by giving him a
tow to the next town, about 20 miles down the road. Accepting graciously,
our hero only requested that the Porsche keep it below 40 mph, because
Samurais, as we all know, are subject to spontaneous rollovers at anything
more than crawling velocities. Upon departure, the Porsche guy gave our
comrade instructions to simply flash the headlights if the Porsche began to
travel too fast. As they slowly pulled onto the road, our Samurai guy
switched on his emergency flashers, not noticing that one side was not
functioning.
Following along at towrope length behind the Porsche, Mr. Samurai then saw
another dust cloud in his rearview. It was closing so fast on his 4x4 that
he braced for a rear end collision. However, the Mustang GT driver got on
the binders at the last instant and laughed at the scare he gave to our
off-road enthusiast. Only when pulling out to pass did the Mustang driver
see
the low slung 911 turbo in front of the short but tall Samurai.
Now, sports car drivers, being the species of animal that they are, simply
cannot stand to be overtaken by another car. So, the Porsche guy slammed it
into third and, "We're off to the races". Our hero, realizing the situation,
began frantically to flash his headlights, but to no avail. 70, 80, 90, 100
mph and climbing. Helpless, the Samurai guy valiantly gripped the steering
wheel as the two maniacs screamed down the road, side by side...
With the speed still climbing, the three-car convoy reached the crest of a
hill and broke down over the other side. "Uh oh", a radar trap. However,
the drivers of the Porsche and Mustang didn't even get off the gas and
screamed past the cop at 130 mph!!!
The police officer jumped into his black and white, headed out in pursuit
and
radioed ahead for backup.
"Attention county sheriff Smith. Attention sheriff Smith. We've got a hell
of a drag race out here on the Interstate. A Porsche and a Mustang passed
side by side through my radar at 130 miles an hour with, you're not going to
believe this, a Suzuki Samurai hot on their ass, signaling to let him
pass!!!
:beer: :beer:
Just something I wrote up and adapted around 04 years ago at an inspired moment. It might lighten your Friday.........
========================
Our hero was happily driving along a western desert highway in his lifted
and
locked Samurai when, all of a sudden, the beastly little 4x4 just died.
Perplexed, he pulled off to the shoulder, got out and lifted the hood. Now,
being a suspension wizard, but knowing nothing about motors, he just
shrugged
his shoulders and resolved to try to flag someone down.
After a short time, a dust cloud appeared on the horizon, immediately
preceded by a bullet travelling at an extremely high rate of speed. A
Porsche 911 turbo was upon him in no time. He frantically waved his arms,
but the bullet just screamed past. Disappointed, thinking that the driver
had not seen him, he turned to slowly walk back to his ailing Samurai.
Arriving at the side of his Suzuki, he heard the squeal of tires and looked
back to see the Porsche returning in reverse. Out from the car climbed a
long, lean individual, kind of a young Clint Eastwood of the spaghetti
western days.
The owner of the Porsche offered to help the Samurai guy out by giving him a
tow to the next town, about 20 miles down the road. Accepting graciously,
our hero only requested that the Porsche keep it below 40 mph, because
Samurais, as we all know, are subject to spontaneous rollovers at anything
more than crawling velocities. Upon departure, the Porsche guy gave our
comrade instructions to simply flash the headlights if the Porsche began to
travel too fast. As they slowly pulled onto the road, our Samurai guy
switched on his emergency flashers, not noticing that one side was not
functioning.
Following along at towrope length behind the Porsche, Mr. Samurai then saw
another dust cloud in his rearview. It was closing so fast on his 4x4 that
he braced for a rear end collision. However, the Mustang GT driver got on
the binders at the last instant and laughed at the scare he gave to our
off-road enthusiast. Only when pulling out to pass did the Mustang driver
see
the low slung 911 turbo in front of the short but tall Samurai.
Now, sports car drivers, being the species of animal that they are, simply
cannot stand to be overtaken by another car. So, the Porsche guy slammed it
into third and, "We're off to the races". Our hero, realizing the situation,
began frantically to flash his headlights, but to no avail. 70, 80, 90, 100
mph and climbing. Helpless, the Samurai guy valiantly gripped the steering
wheel as the two maniacs screamed down the road, side by side...
With the speed still climbing, the three-car convoy reached the crest of a
hill and broke down over the other side. "Uh oh", a radar trap. However,
the drivers of the Porsche and Mustang didn't even get off the gas and
screamed past the cop at 130 mph!!!
The police officer jumped into his black and white, headed out in pursuit
and
radioed ahead for backup.
"Attention county sheriff Smith. Attention sheriff Smith. We've got a hell
of a drag race out here on the Interstate. A Porsche and a Mustang passed
side by side through my radar at 130 miles an hour with, you're not going to
believe this, a Suzuki Samurai hot on their ass, signaling to let him
pass!!!
:beer: :beer: