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Old 12-11-2012, 09:39 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Questions about Superman...

Random thoughts and questions about the man of steel:

How does he cut his hair?
When he takes a piss, does he drill through the toilet and 20 feet into the ground?
When he farts, does he create a sonic boom?
What does he use to clip his finger nails?
Does he give paper cuts instead of get them?
What sort of damage does he do when he has a nightmare?
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Old 12-11-2012, 10:03 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I'm confused, you AREN'T talking about Chuck Norris?
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Old 12-11-2012, 10:04 PM   #3 (permalink)
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How many girls got the back of their heads blown off before he quit asking them to swallow?
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Old 12-11-2012, 10:12 PM   #4 (permalink)
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too much logic. the whole bearded look in the new one's trailer had me thinking "how's that fucker gonna shave? they just showed him on fire and his hair wasn't even burning."


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Old 12-11-2012, 10:21 PM   #5 (permalink)
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These questions would be easily answered if he hadn't died 15 years ago.
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Old 12-12-2012, 04:23 AM   #6 (permalink)
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"I bet he blows a load like a shotgun. Only Wonder Woman has a uterus that could handle that. Anyone else he'd have to use a kryptonite condom. That would kill him."
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Old 12-12-2012, 05:28 AM   #7 (permalink)
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If he is so smart, why does he wear his underwear on the outside?
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Old 12-12-2012, 05:28 AM   #8 (permalink)
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If Superman falls of off a horse, oh wait, nevermind...

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Old 12-12-2012, 05:44 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
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"I bet he blows a load like a shotgun. Only Wonder Woman has a uterus that could handle that. Anyone else he'd have to use a kryptonite condom. That would kill him."

First thing I thought of...
Superman's Baby Scene from Mallrats Movie (1995) | MOVIECLIPS
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Old 12-12-2012, 05:54 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
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I'm confused, you AREN'T talking about Chuck Norris?
Chuck Norris is like Superman.....only with a toupee.
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Old 12-12-2012, 06:08 AM   #11 (permalink)
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If Superman falls of off a horse, oh wait, nevermind...

I'm going to hell.
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Old 12-12-2012, 06:41 AM   #12 (permalink)
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If he was on a treadmill and he tried to take off...
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Old 12-12-2012, 06:45 AM   #13 (permalink)
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If he was on a treadmill and he tried to take off...
It's the cape man.....not the feet. The treadmill wouldn't have an effect.
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Old 12-12-2012, 06:47 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Adam Blaster View Post
Random thoughts and questions about the man of steel:

How does he cut his hair?
When he takes a piss, does he drill through the toilet and 20 feet into the ground?
When he farts, does he create a sonic boom?
What does he use to clip his finger nails?
Does he give paper cuts instead of get them?
What sort of damage does he do when he has a nightmare?

Was Superman the original source for the term "knock the bottom out of that pussy"?
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Old 12-12-2012, 06:49 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Was Superman the original source for the term "knock the bottom out of that pussy"?
Wouldn't it really be the top?
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Old 12-12-2012, 07:26 AM   #16 (permalink)
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"of course I can ride a horse.. I'm super man"
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Old 12-12-2012, 07:47 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
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"I bet he blows a load like a shotgun. Only Wonder Woman has a uterus that could handle that. Anyone else he'd have to use a kryptonite condom. That would kill him."
That's what Supergirl is for
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Old 12-12-2012, 08:07 AM   #18 (permalink)
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That's what Supergirl is for
Exactly

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Old 12-12-2012, 08:22 AM   #19 (permalink)
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What's that falling out the bottom of her top? She ain't that old to be sagging.

Otherwise, she's smoking.
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Old 12-12-2012, 08:57 AM   #20 (permalink)
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rib cage due to the way she's standing
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Old 12-12-2012, 09:48 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Superman Dialogue - YouTube
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