Neighbor's dog barks constantly. Not anymore.

[Billy_Manfroy]

DISCLAIMER: This is long and probably will be boring unless you have annoying dogs near you. I needed to vent. There's probably a poll or post about JasonR and ScottFJ40 bumping taints if you need something more PBB'ish.

So my next door neighbor is an old Sicilian guy who's been here since the early 60's but never bothered to learn a language that any human can understand. He's harmless and relatively nice, but dumb as a rock. His wife and kids all speak perfect English w/o an accent, but they can also understand his Retardonish.

I have lived there for 15 years. When I first moved there, they had a beagle jailed permanently in their side yard between my kitchen window and their garage. It NEVER - NOT ONCE saw five minutes outside of their side yard. It barked incessantly and scratched all night on the side door of their garage. When I say incessantly, I mean it never paused even for 30 seconds day or night unless Sr. Jibberish opened the door and grunted in its direction. They spend A LOT of time visiting family out of town, so sometimes I don't see/hear them for weeks at a time. Their youngest son (low 30s?) lives there and basically has the place to himself most of the time.

The dog barked so much, I basically got used to it. I knew it was bad because every single person who came to visit for the first time would just sit there with a dumbfounded look on their face and eventually ask if the thing was ever going to shut up. No was always the answer, and I was never wrong.

We built the first two versions of my race truck there, along with a couple of others for friends. We made a LOT of noise and used to have some very impolite parties replete with whores, loud music, screaming drunk guys who are allergic to sleeping when it's dark, fireworks, occasional gunfire, and even some live music. I have gotten older, and consider my place now more of a retreat to relax within and get some peace and quiet.

Right when I figured for sure the dog was about to FINALLY croak, they brought home a lab and/or retriever puppy with REALLY long hair. They threw it into the doggy jail outside my kitchen window and it barked WAY more often and WAY louder than the beagle. Once it started growing larger than the beagle, and had officially assumed the role of "louder and more obnoxious than you" dog, the beagle up and died. This was about 7 years ago I think. That dog learned from the beagle, and hasn't shut up since. The bonus is that the cocksuckers don't even bother to visit the dog or clean up after it. They hose the dog's area off UNDER MY FENCE so I get to enjoy the copius amounts of wet, stinky, fur-covered turds.

I've asked several times in a nice way if he'd quit doing this, and also get his dogs to shut the fuck up, but he just mumbles and babbles.

The neighbors all hate him because, a. he's stupid, and b. they keep buying dogs and locking them in the side yard and ignoring them for years on end.

So within the last few months, they brought home a THIRD dog. It's a yappy dog, and what it lacks in volume level, it makes up with shrill, fast, never-ending barking. The big dog now only barks when the little dog isn't there. (I think they actually take this one places like a lap dog.)

I've pleaded, considered some more Pirate-esque secret ops, calling the city, etc. With the warmer weather, I have to crack open the kitchen window to get a little air flow. The dogs bark so loud and so often, it makes it impossible to watch a movie or have a reasonable conversation in my kitchen, living room, garage, or even back yard without shouting over them.

So on the 4th, I see the son out front and ask him why they keep getting dogs if they can't spend any time with them or shut them up. He says shit like, "They don't bark." "She's just not used to you." and I just about snapped.

So while cleaning out the side yard last night, the dog finally drove me to insanity. The whole time I was working over there, I'd either yell "Good dog!" everytime it barked (which was about every .75 seconds) or just sing louder than it "Oh, I love doggies!!!" The guy two houses down finally came over to see what the fuck all the commotion was about. I could tell from the look on his face that he instantly recognized that I had permanently crossed the line of living with this shit for one minute longer. He ran home and got a spray bottle filled with water and lemon juice. This was equivilant to lighting a fart with a flamethrower.

He panicked, thinking I was going to do something rash, so he ran home again and called the neighbor's cell to complain. He agreed with me that it was out-of-hand, but admitted that they didn't bother him much becasue they were on my side of the neighbor's house.

By about 9:30, nobody showed up and the dogs never shut up. I finally lost it and moved one of my smaller guitar amplifiers into the side yard, and plugged in a light strip with a distortion pedal. I turned everything up to 11 and propped the guitar up with the pickups against the face of the amp and hit the pedal. It was a glorious screech/wail/hiss/moan thing that eminated from the amplifier. I actually had to plug my ears, and I was BEHIND the amp. After about 2 minutes, I clicked it off and they immediately started barking again. I hit the pedal again and then started adjusting the guitar to make it even more annoying. Another two minutes or so and I clicked it off. Quiet. Nothing. I got pissed and started banging on the fence as hard as I could and yelling "Where you at?" "You ain't so bad!" If they even so much as whimpered I'd do it all over again. After about 15 minutes of this, the dogs would no longer bark no matter WHAT I did to the fence. I win.

This will be repeated every single night until they either die or the cops come and get me. If required, I can roll my Twin Reverb out there that's been highly hopped up and has four 12" speakers in order to escalate.

I also rounded up about half a garbage can full of moldy, shitty fur and deposited in the truck box they leave laying outside.

I feel much better now.

[Bushwhacker]

Have you called animal control, the city, or the cops? If anything it sounds like he could be charged with animal neglect or disturbing the peace.

[UZI 9mm]

Originally Posted by Billy_Manfroy

DISCLAIMER: This is long and probably will be boring unless you have annoying dogs near you. I needed to vent. There's probably a poll or post about JasonR and ScottFJ40 bumping taints if you need something more PBB'ish.

So my next door neighbor is an old Sicilian guy who's been here since the early 60's but never bothered to learn a language that any human can understand. He's harmless and relatively nice, but dumb as a rock. His wife and kids all speak perfect English w/o an accent, but they can also understand his Retardonish.

I have lived there for 15 years. When I first moved there, they had a beagle jailed permanently in their side yard between my kitchen window and their garage. It NEVER - NOT ONCE saw five minutes outside of their side yard. It barked incessantly and scratched all night on the side door of their garage. When I say incessantly, I mean it never paused even for 30 seconds day or night unless Sr. Jibberish opened the door and grunted in its direction. They spend A LOT of time visiting family out of town, so sometimes I don't see/hear them for weeks at a time. Their youngest son (low 30s?) lives there and basically has the place to himself most of the time.

The dog barked so much, I basically got used to it. I knew it was bad because every single person who came to visit for the first time would just sit there with a dumbfounded look on their face and eventually ask if the thing was ever going to shut up. No was always the answer, and I was never wrong.

We built the first two versions of my race truck there, along with a couple of others for friends. We made a LOT of noise and used to have some very impolite parties replete with whores, loud music, screaming drunk guys who are allergic to sleeping when it's dark, fireworks, occasional gunfire, and even some live music. I have gotten older, and consider my place now more of a retreat to relax within and get some peace and quiet.

Right when I figured for sure the dog was about to FINALLY croak, they brought home a lab and/or retriever puppy with REALLY long hair. They threw it into the doggy jail outside my kitchen window and it barked WAY more often and WAY louder than the beagle. Once it started growing larger than the beagle, and had officially assumed the role of "louder and more obnoxious than you" dog, the beagle up and died. This was about 7 years ago I think. That dog learned from the beagle, and hasn't shut up since. The bonus is that the cocksuckers don't even bother to visit the dog or clean up after it. They hose the dog's area off UNDER MY FENCE so I get to enjoy the copius amounts of wet, stinky, fur-covered turds.

I've asked several times in a nice way if he'd quit doing this, and also get his dogs to shut the fuck up, but he just mumbles and babbles.

The neighbors all hate him because, a. he's stupid, and b. they keep buying dogs and locking them in the side yard and ignoring them for years on end.

So within the last few months, they brought home a THIRD dog. It's a yappy dog, and what it lacks in volume level, it makes up with shrill, fast, never-ending barking. The big dog now only barks when the little dog isn't there. (I think they actually take this one places like a lap dog.)

I've pleaded, considered some more Pirate-esque secret ops, calling the city, etc. With the warmer weather, I have to crack open the kitchen window to get a little air flow. The dogs bark so loud and so often, it makes it impossible to watch a movie or have a reasonable conversation in my kitchen, living room, garage, or even back yard without shouting over them.

So on the 4th, I see the son out front and ask him why they keep getting dogs if they can't spend any time with them or shut them up. He says shit like, "They don't bark." "She's just not used to you." and I just about snapped.

So while cleaning out the side yard last night, the dog finally drove me to insanity. The whole time I was working over there, I'd either yell "Good dog!" everytime it barked (which was about every .75 seconds) or just sing louder than it "Oh, I love doggies!!!" The guy two houses down finally came over to see what the fuck all the commotion was about. I could tell from the look on his face that he instantly recognized that I had permanently crossed the line of living with this shit for one minute longer. He ran home and got a spray bottle filled with water and lemon juice. This was equivilant to lighting a fart with a flamethrower.

He panicked, thinking I was going to do something rash, so he ran home again and called the neighbor's cell to complain. He agreed with me that it was out-of-hand, but admitted that they didn't bother him much becasue they were on my side of the neighbor's house.

By about 9:30, nobody showed up and the dogs never shut up. I finally lost it and moved one of my smaller guitar amplifiers into the side yard, and plugged in a light strip with a distortion pedal. I turned everything up to 11 and propped the guitar up with the pickups against the face of the amp and hit the pedal. It was a glorious screech/wail/hiss/moan thing that eminated from the amplifier. I actually had to plug my ears, and I was BEHIND the amp. After about 2 minutes, I clicked it off and they immediately started barking again. I hit the pedal again and then started adjusting the guitar to make it even more annoying. Another two minutes or so and I clicked it off. Quiet. Nothing. I got pissed and started banging on the fence as hard as I could and yelling "Where you at?" "You ain't so bad!" If they even so much as whimpered I'd do it all over again. After about 15 minutes of this, the dogs would no longer bark no matter WHAT I did to the fence. I win.

This will be repeated every single night until they either die or the cops come and get me.

I also rounded up about half a garbage can full of moldy, shitty fur and deposited in the truck box they leave laying outside.

I feel much better now.

I don't care who responds with calling you names, saying you're whatever, the poor doggies, blah blah blah.

Fawking awesome good for you

[Bobzooki]

Originally Posted by Billy_Manfroy

So my next door neighbor is an old Sicilian guy who's been here since the early 60's but never bothered to learn a language that any human can understand. He's harmless and relatively nice, but dumb as a rock. His wife and kids all speak perfect English w/o an accent, but they can also understand his Retardonish.

I have lived there for 15 years.

Wait. You've lived in Retardonia for FIFTEEN YEARS, and haven't learned to speak Retardonish yet? You, sir, are an UGLY AMERICAN!

[Roc Doc]

WOW! I guess the neighbors I have that have stolen my wind chimes, keyed my truck, and stolen rocks from my landscaping (), look OK now.

Isn't there a noise ordinance in your locale? I'd be calling EVERY day.

[Low-Buck J4K]

NFW I'd let that go on for years.

Animal control is your friend, your new "Best" friend.

[mjlogan88]

Wonderful execution. Keep us updated on how it works out.

[ecrist]

Awesome!

[PONY_DRIVER]

Excellent

[Nightshade]

You are far more patient than I would have been.

Good job on the solution, should have done that about 15 years ago though.

[4RunnerGuy]

Originally Posted by Billy_Manfroy

I turned everything up to 11

laffo

Eat a dick Bill. No, I didn't read your crap.

[ky scrambled]

I wish you the best but I am guessin he is out buying another dog as we speak

[Terrys_85_Toy]

A hubcap full of antifreeze will work too. :blackflipoff:

[f0cker]

Originally Posted by ScottFJ40 V2.0

Eat a dick Bill. No, I didn't read your crap.

Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the trailer park today.

[datz510]

Awesome!!! I was gonna suggest getting one of those ultrasonic no-bark devices and aiming it at the dogs from your yard, but the amp trick probably does about the same thing.

The dogs should learn pretty quickly that if they bark, they'll get annoying noises thrown back at them.

[Blame Canada]

That's no quality of life for the dog.

Anti-freeze probably would have been better.

[s10er8]

Fuck animal control. bash their goddam heads in

[EHeye]

Those poor dogs, you hurt there ears!

[jstandle]

My mother in-law had a similar problem about a month ago in the neighboring town. I'm guessing others had complained about the same dogs because she called the Police only once, they showed up and fined the owners of said dogs $250. No more barky.

[Billy_Manfroy]

Originally Posted by Blame Canada

That's no quality of life for the dog.

Anti-freeze probably would have been better.

I don't want to go to jail over this, and these morons would just buy another dog or two. I did, however, ask the lemon juice guy if he had any antifreeze to put in the bottle. Hopefully, the poor, neglected doggies have learned who runs the show now. Friends have tried being nice to them and slipping them goodies and attention through the fence, but it never works.

And I try to NEVER involve authorities as a knee jerk. It's not necessary and I don't like to feel like I'm wasting their time & energy on shit that's so far down the list of important. It's still an option if the home remedies and talking with these dipshits fails. Plus, I used to know Bubba when he lived in Cali, and he just proves cops/gov't slackers are fawking tools. ( Just kidding!)

The ultrasonic thing has been on my mind for ever, so that's what got me to thinking about the feedback assault since I already have plenty of ammo in that direction.

Oh, and Scott, sorry man, nothing personal. Well, except I mentioned you by name...

.

[JasonR]

I would never have entered this thread if you hadn't mentioned my name.

You sir, can suckit.

Originally Posted by f0cker

Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the trailer park today.

Go fuck yourself, he called me out like the turd he is

[dwkremer]

I have never put up with any dogs around my home. They go away.

[s10er8]

pictures of yappy azz dogs