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Old 11-02-2018, 08:39 AM   #51 (permalink)
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1-10 asshole level = 0.7-ish.

Have you considered shipping the crotchfruits off to Africa?

Sallly Struthers will take care of them there for like 59 cents a day.

PM DouchesAllIn about how to take care of kids in need - dude's a role model
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Old 11-02-2018, 08:43 AM   #52 (permalink)
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Tough deal, but if youíre not committed %110, itís best to not go down that road. Iím 51 and understand.


I just turned 41 with a 3 year old and a 3 month old. I couldnít imagine starting over at 51. But for blood its a yes/probably game time decision.

Fully agree that if your not 110% committed then its going to be bad for all involved. Sit down and have some hard conversations with your wife and play devils advocate for each other regardless if you agree with them or not.






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Old 11-02-2018, 08:44 AM   #53 (permalink)
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The sister in law has 3 kids ranging from about 4 ,7 and 10 years old.
I understand what your saying, but those kids need love and parenting otherwise they are doomed to repeat their parent's lives. The foster system and the state will do nothing to help other than make sure they turn 18
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Old 11-02-2018, 08:52 AM   #54 (permalink)
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1-10 asshole level = 0.7-ish.

Have you considered shipping the crotchfruits off to Africa?

Sallly Struthers will take care of them there for like 59 cents a day.
Are the flies included or sold separately?
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"THIS IS WHERE WE HOLD THEM!!! THIS IS WHERE WE FIGHT!!! THIS IS WHERE THEY'RE DEPORTED!!!"

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BUILD THIS WALL, BOYS!!!

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Old 11-02-2018, 08:55 AM   #55 (permalink)
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Are the flies included or sold separately?
Those "emotional support pets" are included at no extra charge.
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Old 11-02-2018, 08:56 AM   #56 (permalink)
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Seriously, do you want to be 60 years old and a 14 year old living at home with you? Amazes me how people will sacrifice their lives and EVERYTHING for kids who are going to dump you the 1ST opportunity they get!
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:00 AM   #57 (permalink)
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Go meet with the father of the two and talk with him. Help him, advocate for him to get all the kids.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:01 AM   #58 (permalink)
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I just turned 41 with a 3 year old and a 3 month old. I couldnít imagine starting over at 51. But for blood its a yes/probably game time decision.

Fully agree that if your not 110% committed then its going to be bad for all involved. Sit down and have some hard conversations with your wife and play devils advocate for each other regardless if you agree with them or not.
I bet if the OP had an empty nest for few years; time to himself and lovely wife, he might be more inclined.



However; if perhaps, said kids are high maintenance due to an unhealthy environment, that might be a deal-breaker.

Because said OP's #1 focus is keeping his marriage intact.

Shit like this can and could very well destroy his marriage.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:03 AM   #59 (permalink)
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Sallly Struthers will take care of them there for like 59 cents a day.
I spit out my water, my mind brought me this..

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Old 11-02-2018, 09:03 AM   #60 (permalink)
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Those "emotional support pets" are included at no extra charge.
Ah; good point!
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:32 AM   #61 (permalink)
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The youngest should pull in SS if dad died, not that a monthly check should be the deciding factor, but it can be a piece of the puzzle
What was his income level? I know a widow whos husband made under 30k a year, she gets ~600mo for one kid
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:36 AM   #62 (permalink)
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Have you considered shipping the crotchfruits off to Africa?

Sallly Struthers will take care of them there for like 59 cents a day.
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Originally Posted by CDA 455 View Post
Are the flies included or sold separately?
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Those "emotional support pets" are included at no extra charge.
This is all fucking terrible but I can't stop laughing.



Wife and I have talked about this situation if her sister ends up leaving a kid behind, but at this point, I don't think it would happen without her dying, thankfully. Taking on 3 more at 51 has to feel like an impending heart attack. It can basically ruin your life for you, if you had any plans of relaxing during retirement.

Moral side of me says you should take them, if dad can't take his. If dad can, hopefully he's willing to take the third to keep them all together. I'd at least do what I can to help him out, because raising 3 kids as a single dad has to be hell. Your marriage is also guaranteed to fail at some point if you say no outright, even though that would be my first instinct.

Unfortunately, the burden of raising, or at least paying for everyone else's fuckups seems to be the curse of those willing to work and be responsible.

I give you an asshole rating of 3. Life is an unfair bitch. It sucks that keeping your marriage is likely going to be the compromise for keeping the rest of your money and retirement years. Best of luck getting dad to take his.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:39 AM   #63 (permalink)
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Seriously, do you want to be 60 years old and a 14 year old living at home with you? Amazes me how people will sacrifice their lives and EVERYTHING for kids who are going to dump you the 1ST opportunity they get!
it is called maturity, family and sacrifice. All admirable traits IF you have them. If you don't, don't appear to be a hero to others while actually sucking ass as a human.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:43 AM   #64 (permalink)
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ON 1-10, 1.16
This might be a bit high for the question in general.

But you're on Pirate, so it's an automatic 10.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:52 AM   #65 (permalink)
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We are the same age, I would rather put my dick in a blender than take on a 4 year old kid let alone 3 kids. If their mother is that fucked up, they are probably similarly fucked up. Apple, tree and all that shit.

You have 5 years to go until you are free from yours, don't fuck that up now.
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Old 11-02-2018, 09:57 AM   #66 (permalink)
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I get where the wife is coming from but I wouldn't either. If they were actual family I'd consider it but given your age probably still not.

My parents just fought for 2 years to get my junkie step brother and his junkie ex's 3 kids and finally got approved and got them out of foster care. I get it, but it's also batshit insane. They're both 55, the youngest just turned 2 and the oldest is about to turn 8. It's highly likely that my step dad will be dead by the time the youngest graduates and my mom will be 71. And nevermind the mental issues. The two year old and middle boy are fine, but the oldest is batshit insane already and has all kinds of behavioral issues from PTSD, abandonment issues, ect that get her in trouble all the time at only 7. She's going to be totally nuts by the time she's in high school.

My mom also doesn't get that I don't want to be involved at all. I barely knew my stepbrother, barely know the kids, don't like kids in general, and to me they're not family and she just flat out doesn't get that. I just turned 31 and intentionally don't have kids of my own for just about every reason there is not to have one. I've made it abundantly clear to her that if something happens to her and my step dad I'm not taking them and she doesn't get that either. I have no idea what will happen in that scenario.

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Old 11-02-2018, 10:13 AM   #67 (permalink)
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:20 AM   #68 (permalink)
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yes. you are an asshole.

if you have to ask the question, you already feel the guilt of being such an asshole.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:24 AM   #69 (permalink)
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Why is everyone leaving the fact the OP has a 13 year old kid now out of the discussion? Shouldn't his decision be based on what is best for his own child?

Note: I have no kids and never will.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:34 AM   #70 (permalink)
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The sister in law has 3 kids ranging from about 4 ,7 and 10 years old. She is a piece of shit and the state is gonna take them and i told my wife i didnt want them. My own kids were about 13 years apart with the youngest now being 13 so ive basically been raising a kid for the last 26 years,ill be 50 next year. How big of an asshole does this make me?
I'm 55. My kids are 2, 5 and 7.
Best. Damn. Thing. That ever happened to me.

Raising kids, when you're old enough to know what you're doing makes it a lot easier.

Regarding your asshole status, that's up to you and your wife to figure out. But, when the nephews and nieces turn out like their mother, you'll always wonder if you could have made a difference.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:41 AM   #71 (permalink)
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I'm 55. My kids are 2, 5 and 7.
Best. Damn. Thing. That ever happened to me.

Raising kids, when you're old enough to know what you're doing makes it a lot easier.

Regarding your asshole status, that's up to you and your wife to figure out. But, when the nephews and nieces turn out like their mother, you'll always wonder if you could have made a difference.
I disagree. Will you be able to physically participate in your kids sports and activities when you get older? I'll say not at the level you're at now and if so, you're going to be too old. I've seen lot of guys worn out in their 60s. Additionally, if you were to take on 3 other kids who possibly will be rotten, do you want them around to corrupt your kids? I came from a family of 10, step brothers and sisters that were absolute hell raisers and never was there peace at home, until they were gone. Selfish, yes, but think past tomorrow, past 5 years. be objective.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:46 AM   #72 (permalink)
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Why is everyone leaving the fact the OP has a 13 year old kid now out of the discussion? Shouldn't his decision be based on what is best for his own child?

Note: I have no kids and never will. <a href="https://www.pirate4x4.com/forum/images/smilies/thefinger.gif" border="0" alt="" title="flipoff2" >:-)</a>
I was waiting for someone to point this out.

Also, start planning your home addition, new cars, etc. With the state involved you will need 2 new cars that are newish and have proper room for the entire family. Oh, and they will have to meet certain crash safety levels too. At least that is what my buddy here is dealing with.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:47 AM   #73 (permalink)
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I'm 55. My kids are 2, 5 and 7.
Best. Damn. Thing. That ever happened to me.

Raising kids, when you're old enough to know what you're doing makes it a lot easier.

Regarding your asshole status, that's up to you and your wife to figure out. But, when the nephews and nieces turn out like their mother, you'll always wonder if you could have made a difference.
Holy crap. Can't imagine that - but at 48 mine are 28,22 and 20. Starting over with young kids at this point would be a no-go, we're getting close to having grandkids.
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Old 11-02-2018, 10:52 AM   #74 (permalink)
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it is called maturity, family and sacrifice. All admirable traits IF you have them. If you don't, don't appear to be a hero to others while actually sucking ass as a human.
You've posted in here a few times and if you could handle it...beer to you but, you are coming off as you think you are morally superior to those otherwise. Or maybe that's just the way I'm reading your post.
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Old 11-02-2018, 11:01 AM   #75 (permalink)
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I have just got to reply to this thread. My older sister, whom I was pretty close to growing up. Married a shitty man. They raised their three kids, the youngest who has Downís syndrome. She was a shitty mother. Not a addict or anything. They just never mad them mind. If they wanted something they would scream until they got their way.
Fast forward and the daughter becomes a tweeker and sleep around whore. She ends up having four kids, non of which have the same father. The daughter steals my moms whole inheritance. $14,000 My mom still tryís to save her. It destroys my relationship with my mother. Then it puts her in the grave. My sister rescued all of them from the foster care system. Raised the them as her own. They are as fucked up as their mother. My niece got off drugs and moved in with my sister to HELP her raise them. What a fucking joke. My sister now had five kids in her house. Her daughter moved out a couple of months ago into low income housing. She is now hitting all the bars and trying her best to fuck every willing thing with a dick.
Tell this story to you wife. It is just the tip of the iceberg to this story.
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