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Old 11-08-2019, 07:08 AM   #51 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by JunkyTJ View Post
Sorry for the way it turned out. I had to deal with an uncle who offed himself. He was in the middle of the divorce. His last act was to sign the divorce papers. He was under the care of a "mental health professional." I was holding his guns for him. He got one from his room mate. As you can imagine the exwife fought to have the signed divorce papers annulled so all his shit became her shit. His parents and child had to buy his shit at public auction if it meant anything to them. He called me the night before he did it. I didn't get the voice mail until after it was done. He just wanted to call and talk to me. The whole thing was a shitshow from start to finish.


I have a nephew (other side of the family) hooked on meth and he's suicidal right now. He's a fucking mess like you describe. He stole about $600 from me and tore up around another $1K worth of shit just to get the $600. I hope he gets it under control, but I have my doubts at this point.

I also had a great uncle I was close to that had a shit ton of medical issues. He fought like hell until he lost the quality of life he could handle and done himself in.

All 3 are very different for the family and friends in they cope. I've already written the nephew off.
I would have the nephew involuntarily committed if you can, but its probably out of your control.
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Old 11-08-2019, 07:14 AM   #52 (permalink)
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I would have the nephew involuntarily committed if you can, but its probably out of your control.
It is very very hard to get that done. I think 3 different Dr's with no association have to sign off on it after the nephew voluntarily reveals all his demons to them individually.
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Old 11-08-2019, 07:26 AM   #53 (permalink)
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Truly sorry for your families loss. I have been down the road of suicidal tendencies. Most of my early teen and High School years were spent suffering with depression and suicidal thoughts. I was sick. I knew something was wrong, but the doctors just kept telling me it was puberty or I was just a lazy teenager. It ate at me anytime I was alone with my thoughts. I did everything to be "normal" and pretend it would pass, but it always came back worse and worse. I would lay in bed in the middle of the day thinking of going into my parents room and grabbing my dad's 44mag and ending it, but I was too scared to try. I had constant vivid dreams of different ways I could end my suffering. I fought demonic voices and thoughts constantly. The only things that kept me from taking the final step was that deep down I knew I wanted to live and that there was nothing I was going through that was as bad as what I'd be putting my mom through if I did end it. I finally got to the point my mom knew that there was something seriously wrong despite me insisting I was ok. After close to 6 years of going down hill we finally forced the Dr. to send me to a sleep specialist and I was diagnosed with Narcolepsy. The diagnosis and prescription drugs helped but didn't end the misery.

I continued to suffer from depression off and on for years. I was able to function and carry on a "normal" life, but I continued to isolate myself from everyone (outside of going to work) for extended periods of time. I hated myself, had extremely low self esteem and convinced myself that I was not worthy of anyone's love. Anytime something bad happened I would slip back into the suicidal thoughts. Though never near as strong as they had been in HS, they would nag at me often.

I was raised to and convinced myself that toughing it out was the only way to get through anything. I now believe that this was likely what was holding me back and keeping from escaping the rabbit hole. Once I finally started talking about the suicidal thoughts and depression, I actually started to get better. I didn't go to a professional, but just talking about it to friends was enough to bring me around. The final thing that has basically eliminated the issue altogether was leaving a career that I thought I loved. I was surrounded by negative people and would reflect the environment I was in. Removing that negativity was instrumental in closing the door on that chapter in my life. It only took 30 years to get over it.

Anyone that hasn't suffered with suicide doesn't understand it's power. Yes it is selfish, but only because it consumes every ounce of an individuals being. It shuts down your ability to rationalize, to think of others, to focus on anything other than the pain. I believe it has lead to the majority of the demand for hard drugs and alcoholism. The victims are looking for an escape from the demons in their head. Drugs and alcohol can hide the problems, but they will never cure them and in many cases only contribute to making them worse. I can't say for certain what the cure is because every case is different, but I do know without a doubt that it is 100% up to the individual to figure it out for themselves. We can't force people to get better, we just need to be there to help and to provide them with the tools necessary to move forward.
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Old 11-08-2019, 07:46 AM   #54 (permalink)
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Sorry for your loss.

Looks like you've signed up to see someone and get it out in the open. It's not your fault. You will get through this.
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Old 11-08-2019, 08:03 AM   #55 (permalink)
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Sorry for your loss. This was a hard thread to read. I have been the "last call" for three different people, one of them my own mother. Thank God none of them went through with it and haven't to date. Life is a struggle, and sometimes that struggle becomes too much to bear. All I can do is try to help those in my life with their struggle, but it is ultimately up to them what they decide to do. You can't beat yourself up for someone else's actions.

Wyoming is consistently in the top 5 suicide rates by state in the US. It is something that unfortunately happens a lot around me and has affected pretty much every person I know. Again, I am sorry for your loss and I wish you and your family the best in managing the effects of your loss.

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Old 11-08-2019, 10:55 AM   #56 (permalink)
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That's tough to read. Sorry for your loss. Sucks that family had to clean up the mess, it's not their fault.
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