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Topic Review (Newest First)
10-09-2019 10:48 AM
GiS I'll go 4-6 days sober and will feel like a million bucks, will be mentally sharper, will physically feel better/healthier/more fit and then somehow I will justify rewarding myself with a day off the wagon .. "Its Monday night football and you've been doing so well, treat yourself to a six pack and put your feet up, you've earned it!" .. then of course I find it takes me another 3-4 days to refocus and get back on track only to have the cycle repeat.

"Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose" - Lyndon B. Johnson
10-08-2019 06:34 PM
2JZ I posted here months ago that I was gonna quit. Didn't happen. Have been a nightly whiskey drinker for years. But I haven't had any alcohol since Friday. So today is day 4 for me. Not sure if I'm gonna quit for good, I just cant keep drinking a fifth every 2-3 days. Day in and day out. Its taking its toll on my body. I haven't been sleeping much the last few days, hopefully that gets better. But 4 sober hours of sleep seems more restful than 8 hours of drunken sleep.

My daughter is getting married Saturday. It will be a "sober" wedding. No one else on either side of the family drinks. So it would just be the wife and I. Somehow I pictured myself as being the drunken belligerent Dad at my daughters wedding. Should be interesting times.
10-07-2019 12:39 PM
KDXSR5 Been helping a friend work through quitting smoking and drinking. Smoking was easy, the drinking has been difficult. Keep strong guys, even if you have to do it minute by minute. It's tough going through it yourself, it's a whole other thing to see someone you care about struggling through it. Just remember that no matter what choices you made in the past, even if it was 10 minutes ago, you have the chance to make a different choice now. Every choice made towards your own goal is a reason to be proud of yourself even if you do fuck up again. Just keep trying and don't give up on yourself!
10-07-2019 10:46 AM
TiTRD
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post

Tobacco AND alcohol in the same month? Do you just hate yourself?
Never really needed chew unless I was stressed or drinking. I've reduced stress and stopped drinking. If I wasn't stressed or not drinking, I'd go days or weeks without it. Was pretty easy to quit for me (so far).
10-07-2019 09:47 AM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by TiTRD View Post
Day 7.

Doing the sober October thing. Not sure if it'll go beyond that, but needed a reset. Went to a buddy's camp this weekend armed with seltzer water, monster, and water. Was nice waking up without a hangover.

Edit: Quit chewing 15 days ago. Short term that sucked, but little urge now.
Good job. A month is actually pretty long. You'll have all the same feelings as someone who quits. shitty day at work, social events, someone offers a beer then asks why you aren't drinking, FOMO, etc.

Tobacco AND alcohol in the same month? Do you just hate yourself?

Waking up without a hangover is kind of what keeps me going. I'm pretty sure my wife wouldn't care if I got shitfaced camping or whatever ONE night, but I sure wouldn't like it.
10-07-2019 09:44 AM
H8DWINGS I can't say Bubly tastes like sodium. I don't drunk much salt water, but the Gatorade I drink has 230 mg, and sparkling water apparently has no requirement to list the ACTUAL ingredients. Either it's all the running I'm doing, or I'm somehow immune from it, but my doctor hasn't ever told me I have high sodium levels.

45ACP: gotcha. I don't recall my family telling me drinking was bad, or good, outside of a few times Mom acted like me having A beer at 15 was going to get me shitfaced, or when I had one at a graduation party, didn't try to hide it from her at all, and she gave me the "I KNEW YOU WERE DRINKING" tone. I was 18 and didn't care if she saw. I also didn't become a pothead because parents/tv/whatever told me weed was bad. So I guess I don't see how it applies. I think some people just like getting really drunk (raises hand) and other people don't like feeling that way.
10-07-2019 05:40 AM
ky scrambled
Quote:
Originally Posted by TiTRD View Post
Day 7.

Doing the sober October thing. Not sure if it'll go beyond that, but needed a reset. Went to a buddy's camp this weekend armed with seltzer water, monster, and water. Was nice waking up without a hangover.
I just got back from a Thur-Sun wheeling trip where I did the exact opposite.
10-07-2019 05:36 AM
TiTRD Day 7.

Doing the sober October thing. Not sure if it'll go beyond that, but needed a reset. Went to a buddy's camp this weekend armed with seltzer water, monster, and water. Was nice waking up without a hangover.

Edit: Quit chewing 15 days ago. Short term that sucked, but little urge now.
10-07-2019 05:19 AM
LeadfootCJ7
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
Where did you find this out? Says nothing on the can. Sounds like something someone made up and spread on the face pages so people start taking it as truth.
I'm not expert and haven't dealt with this specific product. Most of those flavored waters have a decent amount of sodium (I presume based on how they add the flavoring)
10-07-2019 04:58 AM
45acp
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
Eh, power drinking to the point of making others quit isnít parents fault. I went to college with a guy who said he would drink a 30 pack a night. Even then I knew that was WAY too much beer for one guy who wasnít even 21 to drink. My dad quit drinking before I can remember and I still drink to get drunk. Itís no one elseís fault. People make choices. Some choose to drink until it hurts because itís fun. Some choose to hang out with those people and laugh alongside while also having a smile on their face the next morning when everyone else feels like they drank too much. Plenty of adults act the same ways kids do and know better.
I don't think that was his point- he's not really blaming the parents taking the responsibility off the end user... just pointing out that the lack of guidance with alcohol doesn't help.

Along the same lines (since I still have or know alot of childhood friends)

- Most of the kids who had parents that were moderate/ responsible drinkers grew up to be moderate. Sure, they partied a little but quickly figured out that hangovers suck, getting shitfaced is stupid, and fell into moderate usage.

- Most of the kids who had parents that were teetotalers with drinking being wrong/ sinful/ wicked grew up to be drunks. A handful figured out moderation, but way later in life than necessary. Others became alcoholics, once a week problem drinkers, or reformed teetotalers themselves.
10-06-2019 09:15 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by engnmonkey View Post
Maybe i worded that poorly.
We replaced soda with a flavored sparkling water beverage called clear american, which has aspartame (an artificial sweetner) listed on the can.

We then started drinking Bubly, which we both prefer due to the lack of artificial sweetner
Ah. Yeah I buy like 4 12 packs, bitch about spending $20 then say Ďpfff Iíd spend that on a bottle last year.í Or my favorite is when my wife says itís a lot and I say Ďyeah beer is a lot cheaper. Letís go grab a 30 pack of Coors Light.í
10-06-2019 09:13 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by ADD View Post
This is the exact reason why I'm now part of this thread. Only replace wife, with fiance.

I got kicked out of the house probably 5 times in the last 5 months because she never knew who was gonna walk through the door when I got home from work. I tried to hide it as much as I could. I'd play it off and blame it on my medication....she knew I was lying.
3 days would pass and I'd talk my way back in, say I would change and she would believe me.
Well this last time was the final time....

She has now seen that I have changed. I'm still going to therapy on my own, we are doing couples therapy as well, and our relationship couldn't be stronger since I have quit the sauce.
Iíd drink and pass out on the couch. Wife told me I pissed on the bedroom floor and I didnít remember it. She hated me when I hit 4 beers (cuz thatís when she stopped counting and I decided I was drinking them all) and Iím no (in MY VIEW) different now than I was drunk except I donít have the drunk feeling. I never got kicked out but got threatened with divorce. I felt like a piece of shit when I told her Ďthere is nothing in your life Iíd tell you you canít ever do againí almost as a way to allow myself to drink still. Now....I ainít got time cuz I got too much shit to do. Weird how that seemed to work out. I had plenty of time to day drink last year but this year I seem to do more. I didnít even sit down (except driving) until dinner and after that it was about 8:00 when I hit the couch to fold laundry. A year ago that was when Iíd be on beer 4 cuz I could drink two more before bed and wake up Ďjust fineí for work.
10-06-2019 09:08 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by stjames151 View Post
Thatís a fair statement, but you probably also didnít have someone egging you on to play Russian roulette cause they were impressed with your ability to not shoot yourself. Iím simply saying that thereís such a stigma around adults allowing the younger crowd to imbibe in their presence that they often are only surrounded by ignorant peers suggesting errant behavior is not only acceptable, but preferable (ie. drinking games that glamorize those that can hold out well past others). I had several friends that were known as ďthe guy that could drink you under the tableĒ and were expected to, as though that was a good thing. They, to a person, are all alcoholics to the detriment of everyone in their sphere of influence. Iím not suggesting they are not responsible for their own actions, but learned responses are harder to overcome when dealing with addictive substances.
Eh, power drinking to the point of making others quit isnít parents fault. I went to college with a guy who said he would drink a 30 pack a night. Even then I knew that was WAY too much beer for one guy who wasnít even 21 to drink. My dad quit drinking before I can remember and I still drink to get drunk. Itís no one elseís fault. People make choices. Some choose to drink until it hurts because itís fun. Some choose to hang out with those people and laugh alongside while also having a smile on their face the next morning when everyone else feels like they drank too much. Plenty of adults act the same ways kids do and know better.
10-06-2019 07:52 PM
stjames151
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
I bought my first handgun with no instructions and I could have purchased as much ammo as I wanted. Nothing to stop me from dumping a full cylinder of 357 into the desert Ďbecause my friend dared meí and I think I bought a 357 because the guy behind the counter said revolvers were better than semi autos. Society isnít to blame for my choices. I had access to the internet and downloading porn was a regular thing but I didnít go to kiddie stuff or animal beating. There wasnít really a joint Ďletís watch sexí thing so I guess I miss the point. I was old enough to know what I was doing (drinking to get drunk) and my wife expected me to make a change or she would.
Thatís a fair statement, but you probably also didnít have someone egging you on to play Russian roulette cause they were impressed with your ability to not shoot yourself. Iím simply saying that thereís such a stigma around adults allowing the younger crowd to imbibe in their presence that they often are only surrounded by ignorant peers suggesting errant behavior is not only acceptable, but preferable (ie. drinking games that glamorize those that can hold out well past others). I had several friends that were known as ďthe guy that could drink you under the tableĒ and were expected to, as though that was a good thing. They, to a person, are all alcoholics to the detriment of everyone in their sphere of influence. Iím not suggesting they are not responsible for their own actions, but learned responses are harder to overcome when dealing with addictive substances.
10-06-2019 01:29 PM
SanDiegoCJ
Quote:
Originally Posted by ADD View Post
This is the exact reason why I'm now part of this thread. Only replace wife, with fiance.

I got kicked out of the house probably 5 times in the last 5 months because she never knew who was gonna walk through the door when I got home from work. I tried to hide it as much as I could. I'd play it off and blame it on my medication....she knew I was lying.
3 days would pass and I'd talk my way back in, say I would change and she would believe me.
Well this last time was the final time....

She has now seen that I have changed. I'm still going to therapy on my own, we are doing couples therapy as well, and our relationship couldn't be stronger since I have quit the sauce.
Sharon knew me when I was still drinking. She got divorced after I'd quit and she's told me that she would have never gone out with me if I'd still been drinking.
10-06-2019 11:38 AM
ADD
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
I was old enough to know what I was doing (drinking to get drunk) and my wife expected me to make a change or she would.
This is the exact reason why I'm now part of this thread. Only replace wife, with fiance.

I got kicked out of the house probably 5 times in the last 5 months because she never knew who was gonna walk through the door when I got home from work. I tried to hide it as much as I could. I'd play it off and blame it on my medication....she knew I was lying.
3 days would pass and I'd talk my way back in, say I would change and she would believe me.
Well this last time was the final time....

She has now seen that I have changed. I'm still going to therapy on my own, we are doing couples therapy as well, and our relationship couldn't be stronger since I have quit the sauce.
10-06-2019 05:34 AM
engnmonkey
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
Where did you find this out? Says nothing on the can. Sounds like something someone made up and spread on the face pages so people start taking it as truth.
Maybe i worded that poorly.
We replaced soda with a flavored sparkling water beverage called clear american, which has aspartame (an artificial sweetner) listed on the can.

We then started drinking Bubly, which we both prefer due to the lack of artificial sweetner
10-06-2019 04:30 AM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by stjames151 View Post
I've not ever heard someone put this more succinctly. Nearly all the people I know that could carry on past "the line" early in life got "put to the challenge" pretty regularly. It was a novelty that entertained other's curiosity for a minute, but put the challenged in a spiral that was difficult to get out of for the rest of their lives.....if they made it out. I think part of the difficulty maximized by our culture is the puritanical separation of adults from adolescents in this arena. We don't just let kids go out and drive, shoot, or make take other major leaps unless we personally guide them through their first steps, yet we expect that one day, they'll just know how to drink/vote without oversight and leadership and guidance.
I bought my first handgun with no instructions and I could have purchased as much ammo as I wanted. Nothing to stop me from dumping a full cylinder of 357 into the desert Ďbecause my friend dared meí and I think I bought a 357 because the guy behind the counter said revolvers were better than semi autos. Society isnít to blame for my choices. I had access to the internet and downloading porn was a regular thing but I didnít go to kiddie stuff or animal beating. There wasnít really a joint Ďletís watch sexí thing so I guess I miss the point. I was old enough to know what I was doing (drinking to get drunk) and my wife expected me to make a change or she would.
10-05-2019 09:40 PM
stjames151
Quote:
Originally Posted by 909wheeler View Post
..... The least fortunate IMO are those who can tolerate a lot of alcohol right out of the gate. They are often praised at parties as a guy/gal that can drink anyone under the table.

The more you can tolerate, the more you drink and as tolerence builds up, the more you HAVE to drink to get to where you used to be "happy".
I've not ever heard someone put this more succinctly. Nearly all the people I know that could carry on past "the line" early in life got "put to the challenge" pretty regularly. It was a novelty that entertained other's curiosity for a minute, but put the challenged in a spiral that was difficult to get out of for the rest of their lives.....if they made it out. I think part of the difficulty maximized by our culture is the puritanical separation of adults from adolescents in this arena. We don't just let kids go out and drive, shoot, or make take other major leaps unless we personally guide them through their first steps, yet we expect that one day, they'll just know how to drink/vote without oversight and leadership and guidance.
10-05-2019 09:17 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by broncokyle88 View Post
133 days

The next thing you know you are done.
133...you quit right after me. Memorial Day weekend. Nice.
10-05-2019 09:14 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by engnmonkey View Post
My wife turned me on to the bubly flavored water. We had replaced soda in our diet with the clear american water, but that had artificial sweetner.

I drink plain water all day, but have a bubly at lunch and dinner instead of soda
Where did you find this out? Says nothing on the can. Sounds like something someone made up and spread on the face pages so people start taking it as truth.
10-05-2019 09:13 PM
H8DWINGS
Quote:
Originally Posted by ADD View Post
I'll be coming through reno the weekend before Halloween on my way to sand mountain. I'm down to help if ya need it. Or we can meet up for a water
Possibly. Thatís nevada day and my wife is leaving town the week after so I might actually be busy with family chit.
10-05-2019 01:25 PM
CJF
Quote:
Originally Posted by ADD View Post
Or we can meet up for a water
Lol...

Gotta do what ya gotta do...
10-05-2019 12:58 PM
ADD
Quote:
Originally Posted by H8DWINGS View Post
Awesome man. I think those were some of the hardest weeks, then you measure in months and pretty soon youíre not even counting just wondering ďHow long HAS it been?Ē

If youíre ever in Reno and want to help figure out some electrical issues (window doesnít work) on an 89 XJ Iím available.

I'll be coming through reno the weekend before Halloween on my way to sand mountain. I'm down to help if ya need it. Or we can meet up for a water
10-05-2019 08:24 AM
broncokyle88 133 days

The biggest piece of advice I got came from Randy Blythe of lamb of god. He explained that when he quit drinking he didnít tell himself he was quitting drinking for the rest of his life, because thatís fucking hard and it was impossible for him to convince himself he could do it. He just asked himself ďcan I just not drink for the next five minutes?Ē Taking an impossible task and breaking it up into smaller, doable pieces. We all have the self control to refrain from doing something for that short of a time, and if you can do that five you can do the next five. Eventually that five minutes turns into an hour, then a day, etc. But never focusing on more than the next 5-10 minutes at a time.

After hearing that from him shit really clicked in my head, gears started to turn and whatnot. It really breaks down the enormity of the task, taking forever and reducing it to 5-10 minute chunks. It helped to narrow my focus on it. Instead of looking at it like some daunting task like rebuilding an entire engine, itís breaking it down to its most basic steps. Turn this bolt, then this bolt, then the next one, and next thing you know you are done.
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