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I'll just make sure the wife drinks enough for both of us.
Why don't you both quit? You could both help each other stay on track with it and hold each other accountable for not drinking. Would also make it easier on you if there is no alcohol around.

I used to buy a 18 or 24 pack every s i n g l e d a y on my way home from work...
Holy shit that is a lot of beer :eek:
 

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Why don't you both quit? You could both help each other stay on track with it and hold each other accountable for not drinking. Would also make it easier on you if there is no alcohol around.



Holy shit that is a lot of beer :eek:
Wife doesn't drink often. MAYBE two beers at dinner. I bought her a six pack last weekend and there are 5 left. I don't NEED her to hold me accountable. I don't care if someone tells me I'm a horrible person for having a legal beverage. I also don't really care if I have someone to call and talk to when I feel like having a drink. Saying "man I'd really like to have a drink because it sounds good" is enough for me to myself and I'm telling myself I'm fine without because I've already gone 3 or 4 days or 60 days. My wife has made it clear if I was drinking a 12 pack a night she wouldn't be married to me.

Danger...yeah I realized I'm still an asshole and I kinda thought I'd change the first time.
 

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I went from drinking 8 beers a day minimum(16-30 on wheeling weeknds) to zero in 1 day almost 9 years ago. Its a full reprogramming of your mind of the things you need and want.


Now the greatest beverage ever is a frosty cold water. Pretty amazing.

If I can be of any help please message me
 

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fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
 

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I went from drinking 8 beers a day minimum(16-30 on wheeling weeknds) to zero in 1 day almost 9 years ago. Its a full reprogramming of your mind of the things you need and want.


Now the greatest beverage ever is a frosty cold water. Pretty amazing.

If I can be of any help please message me
Did something happen? I know that's a bullshit question for me to ask but curiosity got the better of me.
 

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Did something happen? I know that's a bullshit question for me to ask but curiosity got the better of me.
koh 2010 happened. I had a moment of clarity after I saved a mans life while doing everything I could to destroy mine.

Edit: The real issue is shit I bottled up when I was young and covered it up with drinking, At age 8.
 

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fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
The shitty thing is probably how you felt after being off the bottle for so long on Monday. Sorry man. You'll be able to do it next time and think "man last time I drank the fuck out of the weekend and didn't shit change."
 

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fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
Good on you for getting back on the wagon. Don't dwell on the fact that you fell down, focus on the fact that you got back up and like was already mentioned try and learn something from it.

I've gotten a little better at quitting each time 😉

Someone else posted about their reluctance to trying AA. It's not for everyone (myself included) and it can be daunting to take that step but I would encourage anybody on the fence to try a few meetings. Not all groups are the same, it may just be a matter of finding one that suits you and the only requirement to attend is a desire to stop drinking, you don't have to say a word if you don't want to.

When I first got serious about quitting I went once or twice a week, between 3 or 4 different groups over the course of about a year. While I decided that ultimately it wasn't the solution for me I learned A LOT and it really helped me get into a proactive frame of mind.

It's great to see this thread getting bumped regularly!
 

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Had an interesting talk with the GF over the past weekend. During it 'drinking' came up. When we started dating we were besting drinking buds (had been for years prior to dating)

When we moved in she was shocked I drank every night (not to any excess just in general)

Anyway long story short, I agree I drink more than some less than others. It has never been a problem (home or work) but I do drink.

I am contemplating at least cutting back. I prob do 5-8 a night (miller lite) and upwards of double that on weekends.

Never get 'drunk' during the week, sometimes on weekends. But still feel it is prob more than I should be drinking. Health is fine, I get up at 5:30 am every day for work (feeling fine) etc. I am very active and get tons of things done, more projects than most.

We will see. Not going to just stop, just going to make more of a conscious effort to keep track of quantity. At least during the week for now and see where it goes.

For me I want to stop smoking, but every time I have tried I have failed do to drinking. Again health is not an immediate reason so much as cost.

We will see. Maybe a goal for money savings for the year.
 

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fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
Keep trying, don’t give up. Your brain will tell you that nobody knows how bad things are in your unique situation. It’s bullshit. Nothing you’re going through is anything most of us haven’t experienced. If nothing else, the AA program/meetings will have you in the same room with people who have been exactly where you are and are fighting the same fight. I strongly recommend it if you can take what you need from it and leave the rest. There are no rules, only suggestions. You’re in my prayers.
 

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koh 2010 happened. I had a moment of clarity after I saved a mans life while doing everything I could to destroy mine.

Edit: The real issue is shit I bottled up when I was young and covered it up with drinking, At age 8.
The Bunk Knife :smokin:


That had to be an eye opener for sure. Thank you for sharing that.
 

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Mock up and tack welds. Sometimes you gotta know how to do it wrong before you do it right. Keep at dude.
The shitty thing is probably how you felt after being off the bottle for so long on Monday. Sorry man. You'll be able to do it next time and think "man last time I drank the fuck out of the weekend and didn't shit change."
Good on you for getting back on the wagon. Don't dwell on the fact that you fell down, focus on the fact that you got back up and like was already mentioned try and learn something from it.

I've gotten a little better at quitting each time 😉

Someone else posted about their reluctance to trying AA. It's not for everyone (myself included) and it can be daunting to take that step but I would encourage anybody on the fence to try a few meetings. Not all groups are the same, it may just be a matter of finding one that suits you and the only requirement to attend is a desire to stop drinking, you don't have to say a word if you don't want to.

When I first got serious about quitting I went once or twice a week, between 3 or 4 different groups over the course of about a year. While I decided that ultimately it wasn't the solution for me I learned A LOT and it really helped me get into a proactive frame of mind.

It's great to see this thread getting bumped regularly!
Keep trying, don’t give up. Your brain will tell you that nobody knows how bad things are in your unique situation. It’s bullshit. Nothing you’re going through is anything most of us haven’t experienced. If nothing else, the AA program/meetings will have you in the same room with people who have been exactly where you are and are fighting the same fight. I strongly recommend it if you can take what you need from it and leave the rest. There are no rules, only suggestions. You’re in my prayers.
thanks for the encouragement. I will say I learned quite a bit :smokin:
 

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fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
I'm no expert, nor can I give you mind blowing motivational speeches... However I can say if you want or *need* to quit drinking, you have to replace it with something healthier for you. We drink to self medicate... find something to replace it. Speaking of which... I need to go ride my bike :homer:
 

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I'm no expert, nor can I give you mind blowing motivational speeches... However I can say if you want or *need* to quit drinking, you have to replace it with something healthier for you. We drink to self medicate... find something to replace it. Speaking of which... I need to go ride my bike :homer:
great point. been trying to get to the gym more often, think I'll go later today to get this Friday afternoon started the right way.
 

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Man, what a tough week... A short 11 months ago I would have had all the excuses in the world I needed to drink, and drink a lot (not that I needed an excuse!). Monday my brother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer, this morning a good friend and neighbor lost the fight against cancer. As others have said in numerous threads: FAWK CANCER!

The good I can take from this, I know a drink or 10 will not change a damn thing, and my resolve to stay sober and be there for those that need me is only getting stronger.

Keep fighting to all of those that want to fight, you can do it.
 

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Hey There,

fucked up again. had a really stressful day on Friday and went through about 2 handles of whiskey over the weekend. back to square one.
Each one of us is different. Success is based on what works for us individually. And, each one of us gets satisfaction from something a little different when it comes to sobriety.

Going on 22-1/2 years sober. Like one of the recent posters, I made a decision to quit one day and haven't looked back. In all honesty, I do miss having a few drinks... or maybe I miss the self-medication. Not a day goes by that I don't give my thanks to a higher power for giving me the strength and clarity to start the journey. I am grateful for my sobriety.

My first wife predicted I would fail. She said that without AA or some other support group I couldn't make it work. Of course, she continued drinking and two years later filed for divorce. (Sounds like a bad country song, I know.)

My recommendation is that you use your set-back as a motivator in the future. I have so many memories of drinking and how it made life a lot more difficult than it needed to be. Every truly bad decision I ever made was when I was drunk, or somewhere in between drunk and sober. I was a functioning alcoholic... and it was only because of something greater than myself that nothing terrible happened to me. Without some of those bad experiences, I may not be able to talk of 22-1/2 years or sobriety.

Good luck to everyone who has made the choice to be sober. (I am kind of jealous that there are people who can drink in a controlled way. I tried several times to prove that I could, too.... and I failed every time. I am comfortable with that now.)

I know I'm probably getting carried away... forgive me. But the topic of a spouse, and how that can affect someone who has quit drinking hits close to home. Several years after my divorce I met someone I cared very much for. Six months after we started dating we went on a houseboat trip with some family. All the adults other than me drank a little too much. I knew I would be really uncomfortable with the drinking so close to home... and so I shared with her that it wasn't going to work between us. She offered to quit drinking, and she hasn't had anything to drink since that conversation. I didn't ask her, nor would thinks have worked out had I made that request. What she did at that time was the greatest gift anyone has ever given me. We've now been married 16 years, and I'm sure that her sacrifice made it possible.

Being honest with yourself is the first step, and then taking things one day at a time makes it easier.

I'm always happy to talk if someone's looking for support.

Jeff
 

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So I continuously keep fawking up. Frequently finding myself at the liquor store grabbing yet another case of beer. Sad thing, and I hate to admit it, is my wife moved out and staying at her dads. Doesn't plan to come back until I can prove I'm making the steps. I'll admit that we've been having a pretty rough go for the last few years. Especially finding out that she can't have kids, and I am starting to learn that I don't really like the idea of raising someone else's kid, or dropping an additional $35K just to do so. I don't know if its the addiction that is making me say fawk it and give up, or if I really need to get sober to know if her and I should continue.

So, can anyone give me an idea of what to expect at AA? Or would it be best to seek an individual counselor first?
 

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So I continuously keep fawking up. Frequently finding myself at the liquor store grabbing yet another case of beer. Sad thing, and I hate to admit it, is my wife moved out and staying at her dads. Doesn't plan to come back until I can prove I'm making the steps. I'll admit that we've been having a pretty rough go for the last few years. Especially finding out that she can't have kids, and I am starting to learn that I don't really like the idea of raising someone else's kid, or dropping an additional $35K just to do so. I don't know if its the addiction that is making me say fawk it and give up, or if I really need to get sober to know if her and I should continue.

So, can anyone give me an idea of what to expect at AA? Or would it be best to seek an individual counselor first?
Sorry to hear about the difficult times. I don't have the answers you seek, but know that you are not alone in your struggles. As has been mentioned before, do not get overwhelmed by the big picture, break it down to much, much smaller "segments", or as you have heard in here- one moment at a time. Get through the next hour, then the next. You can't "fix" everything you mentioned above in one hour or one day, but you can start the process. That start is up to you, and I'm pretty confident in saying that no AA meeting or individual counselor is going to start it for you. It's not easy man, but it does get easier.

Hold yourself accountable, and if you have to use this thread to do it, well, we are a bunch of assholes that will help you! When you reach for a beer or a drink this afternoon/evening, reach for your phone instead- shoot me a text or a call (I'll PM my number to you if you want). I'm a stranger and you don't know me, I don't know you, but I bet we can bullshit about something to take your mind off that next drink.

Stay strong!
 

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Wife moving out is rough. Going to the store and buying beer is a choice. It sucks but when you’re sitting in the parking lot just think “this buzz lasts a day but I actually picked my wife to spend the rest of my life with me.” Maybe it helps. Instead of going to the beer store go to a parts store or electronics store. Anywhere you can’t buy beer or liquor. It MIGHT help. As for the no kids thing...when my wife and I started trying we had that talk and agreed a kid wasn’t worth the time and money of in vitro. I didn’t have the “I want to be a dad SO BAD” thing and I was fine being a cool uncle. Downside is you’ll hear how you don’t understand and not be able to say “I’ll also miss out on everything you say makes it great. “

I made it through Friday. Kinda hard because I was home all day and usually I’d have a beer with lunch on days like that and maybe a couple 6-8 (1/5 if a bottle for the liquor drinkers) that night. Kinda proud and it’s kinda easier to keep the streak going.
 
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